Life got difficult August 23, 2012. Everything had been perfect for nine months, until I began to feel the distance spacing between us as I drove 137 miles back home. Staring out the window transformed my mood and my thoughts. Every song that rang through the tiny tubes into my ears caused the grip around my throat to tighten and the water to build up behind my vision. The east Texas pine trees blurred as tears began to fall. It felt as if days went by until I was able to speak again, my sight revealing itself to the flowers delivered to my front door. My smile made its way back to my round rosy cheeked face. The phone rang at least three times a week but to my surprise the voice on the other end sounded excited and thrilled with the new life he began. I thought he would be lonely; the dorm room walls were so bare and simple. But it never seemed to cause him to miss home. I soon realized my heart was selfish, praying for a selfless; accepting heart became my constant prayer. My emotions went on a roller coaster ride as our relationship grew. We never grew apart, not even for a minute. The distance was hard but built us up.
I started remembering back to the weekend at the river for my best friend’s birthday. Skidding on the water as we flew out of the shoots, we struggle to keep from separating in our individual tubes. The rocks stopped us every once in a while for a moment of rest. We could feel the sun crisping our skin as we drifted in and out of the trees shade and as we smoothed down the gentle rock less water.We laughed as our friend Adam struggled to keep up with the group. Andrew and I were flying with ease down and around every spot. The view was a memorable one; we were both distant in the vision. Soaking up the moment, but my heart was always most pleased when my hand was surrounded by his. We worked so well together, each rough rocky patch we crossed over got easier and easier to overcome. We impressed the others with our skills, but I was most impressed that every time we got separated we did what we could to get back to each other. At the end of the fire hot day on the river, we were the symbol of success.
February 3rd was the first actual “date date” we had ever been on. I’ve always wondered how creative he was and that night was the most excellent way he could have proved himself. The whole night I was anxious of what would come next. The cold air chilled down my spine, as my nerves began to make them self’s known. It was as if I couldn’t speak, so I lay on the tree house pallet waiting for them to pass. I could never tell what was on his mind but I paid close attention to his every move, trying so hard to figure him out. We were like two strangers, scrambling for words to say. I found nothing, but Andrew on the other hand is very seldom speechless. When he was speechless I knew he was thinking of something to say, normally a random story or a goofy idea. After our date high above the ground, ice-cream seemed to be best second event. I was already shivering from the chill and of course my nerves. But the ice-cream hit the spot. This night felt never ending, but when it was time to go home I couldn’t have walked in the house redder. As we ran to the door way trying not to slip on the flooded walk way, the rain beating hard on our skin we began to slow to a stop and our eyes met. We stopped half way up the walk way and I was finally invited into his thoughts, I read them as they ran through my own brain… earlier in the month I had told him about my invisible bucket list. Number three on that list was to go sky diving, following that was to kiss in the rain. That night my list lost one, as I gained a memory and probably a cold as well, and yet again another success.
Footloose was an excellent movie, it made me of course want to dance. Every click of their heels on the wooden floor infuriated me because there’s no way I could do that. It’s always been a dream of mine to dance and have a strong guy to dance with and to lead me. Every time the movie would go to a sweet love seen I glanced at him, he was leaning far away from me, with his head resting on his hand. Was he not having fun, was he second guessing asking me to a movie… My thoughts were loud over the movie, I’m sure everyone in the theatre was distracted by my twitching and fidgeting. Chick-Fil-A was always the perfect talk place; the seats have heard my whole life. When we set down at my now favorite booth, talking about ourselves didn’t last long. God almost immediately stole the conversation. We exchanged stories of lessons God taught us. He told me about how God had been blessing him, I had never before heard someone so God glorifying and so thankful. I did and still to this day look up to Andrew for that, and for his positive views. That night I knew he would be a great thing for me and hopefully I too would be great for him. I knew God had a plan for me, but I began thinking Andrew was a part of that plan at least for right now. I really had no idea the extremity of it.
A night we were at Jennifer’s for a devotional we discovered something miraculous. God was who brought us together. He used Andrew to reach me 3 years before he even existed in my world. I walked into the building of SAGU with all my friends from church, excited but not expecting a change in my life that would last forever to take place that night. My heart was heavy like someone was sitting on my chest holding down the happiness, and I struggled to hide the pain and anger in my eyes. Walking around as a monster trapped inside a smile was how I strolled through the halls and walk ways. I became exhausted and frustrated with how miserable I was. I opened my eyes and my heart saw what I had been missing. Through a human video performance God hit me so hard with what I had been looking for; I knew God was what I had been missing. The room went silent and all I could see and hear was the lyrics and Farley Street Baptists human video. Andrew went to Farley Street Baptist; he was on that stage directly in front of me the night God transformed me. I was broken to the lyrics of that song, and soon to the word of God as I began to dig around desperate for every detail of the bible. I formed a relationship with God and he has been my everything ever sense. I discovered this irony in June, when Andrew asked me when I accepted Christ into my heart. We were astonished to find out that he was there in that exact moment and he was a part of my wake-up call.
We’re now ten months into a relationship and still so strong although I really notice the distance when I’m with all our friends and he is absent. Or when I’ve had a rough day and I’m not able to hug him, and talk to him in person. He is always so good at cheering me up when I’m letting the world hold me down. My life would be so different without Andrew in it. The way I look at life is through his eyes sometimes, it isn’t natural for me but it’s such a better view then my eyes. I learned to laugh at the insignificant things of the world, I learned to put God first, I’ve learned that God does have a plan for me, I’ve found my dance partner and leader, I’ve learned that there will always be a time in your life when you need that moment of rest after you make it over a rocky patch, and distance has no say on how much strength you carry.